Since I've been asking for reader comments, I guess I should acknowledge a few of responses that have really gotten my jeans tented up like fuckin' Barnum & Bailey's. One dude calling himself NYCGooner writes:

Gooning on dick is my single favorite pasttime. I would love to be with another buddy(ies) and to sit back together and revel in the joys of manly masturbation. Talking about penis. Showing the penis. Stimulating the penis. Smelling the penis. Tasting the penis. Loving the penis. Edging the penis. Rewarding the penis. Showering in manseed as we shoot our hot loads of cum over our bodies.

That's a man who's definitely operating on the same wavelength as I am. It's funny that most people think of ''penis'' as a prim little word from high school biology class, but for some guys -- including me, as you've probably noticed -- the word is absolutely fucking charged with eroticism in a way that terms like ''cock'' and ''dick'' aren't. Don't get me wrong; I'm infatuated with those words, too. But there's just a certain... ne znayu chevo* about the word PENIS. Maybe it's because of the biology-class associations that the word is hot. Jane Goodall isn't gonna write ''the male chimpanzee rubbed its dong against the tree limb''; she's gonna say p-e-n-i-s. Thus, hearing it subconsciously reminds us human males of our animalistic nature, our sub-rational, aggressive, primitive male rutting urge, and it ain't hard to figure out what's arousing about that. Well, that's my first attempt at a hypothesis, but whatever the tangled psychology behind it, I think it's one groovy-sounding word.

Another comment I enjoyed:

a man's driving force is between his legs...that's why he'll do anything to protect the hairy orbs n to make sure that the main vein drains em off as often as possible...a man's pride n joy...watch any dude in action...whether he's fuckin, jackin off r gettin blowed n chances are he's got his eyes closed - he doesn't care about his partner - she - he - drop-dead-gorgeous r bone ugly - pussy r palm...what matters to him...ALL that matters to him is that throbbin piece between his legs and the manly charge that's buildin up in the balls behind it...

That says it all, guys.

_{* Russian for je ne sais quoi. Apparently, boycotting all things French is the latest way to show your Yankee Doodle spirit, and I'm just trying to pull my weight. Buy bonds!}