My name is... let's borrow a motif from Mother Goose and say it's Jack. I'm a 32-year-old guy from Brooklyn now living in Northern Virginia. I'm single and looking, and so my sexual outlet is masturbation -- usually alone, as is customary, but sometimes I get lucky and find another dude to stroke with...
You can save your creations and send the link to friends, as I did a little while ago.
Once you're done, you can get back to doing what you came here for, you insatiable dong fiends.
UPDATE: A reader's Picassohead submission. Nicely done, gooner.
I was raised Catholic, but started to drift towards atheism in my teens, and was a Randroid for a couple years in college. (I got better, though.) Nowadays I waver among atheism, agnosticism, and Deism, depending on which day of the week it is. Judaism fascinates me, and I think it makes somewhat more sense than Christianity, but I don't see myself making a formal conversion anytime soon. (Why would I want to give up bacon cheeseburgers for a G-d whose existence I'm not convinced of?) I think of myself of "homosexual," rather than "gay," because "gay" sounds retarded, whereas "homosexual" has a nifty futuristic sound, like "nanotech" or "hologram" or "UltraSuede." I'm a grown-up military brat, was born in Bangkok (nomen est omen?), and before starting high school I'd lived in Gitmo, Turkey, and Okinawa. Я говорю по-русски, but not as fluently as I'd like.
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