News item

The Smoking Gun reports that

_{''an Oklahoma judge used a male enhancement pump, shaved and oiled his nether region, and pleasured himself [while seated on the bench], state officials charged [on June 23] in a petition to remove the jurist.''}

The lavishly-detailed text of the petition, which you can read in full at the Smoking Gun site, notes that one of the witnesses, a court reporter, ''saw Judge Thompson masturbate on a number of occasions and during the course of her employment, saw his penis 15 to 20 times. On one occasion, [she] saw [him] holding his penis up and shaving underneath it with a disposible razor while sitting on the bench. She saw him put lotion on his penis on more than one occasion while on the bench.''

All I can say is, 15 to 20 times?! Dang, that pump must've given some impressive results...

Mailbag update

John in Tennessee, whose awesome dick was featured in the Mailbag a couple days ago, sent a hot follow-up and a second batch of photos. Thanks, dude -- my fuckin' dong would love to get closely acquainted with yours if you're ever passing through the DC area.

While you're admiring John's impressive manhood, scroll down to see some throbbing Argentine tubesteak all ready for the worshipful masturbatory attention that only another male's practiced hand (or slobbering mouth) can give. If his pictures make your dick stiff, be sure to send him a thank-you note.

June showers

(This post and the CPM thread that inspired it are definitely not for all tastes -- but hey, if you're not interested, just hang in there because I'll be posting some new reader cock photos in the Mailbag a little later this afternoon.)

Message #14447:
My first experience with piss play was quite by accident. In fact, I didn't play wit it at all. lol. I was about 15 yo in my bedroom with the door locked bating, completely nude, on my bed. Towards the end of my bate, when I was ready to blow a HUGE load all over everything, I felt my body get ready to let loose. However, when I finally let go, I shot a huge stream of piss all over the bed. It surprised the fuck out of me. Until that moment, I never considered that my full bladder could also contribute to an orgasm. Now, I bate dong on a full bladder lots of times. I've even pissed on cam all over my chest. It was a bitch to clean up! lol. I've also gotten into a dry tub on a few occasions and let piss loads loose on my chest and face. I imagine I'm shooting a cum load that big.

Message #14525:
Hell, I piss on myself all the time too. Last night came home and popped a movie on the DVD. Edged for about 2 hours, smoking weed, and drinking beer. When I could not stand the urge to piss anymore, I put on my favorite boxer/briefs and went to the front porch with a beer and a cigarette. The lady across the street had just gotten home and was taking groceries out of her car. That's when I let go and just pissed where I sat. It filled my briefs and poured through the slats of the chair to the floor. When I was done I went back into the room, stripped and continued edging. I did not cum until this morning and my cum rag was last night's underwear.

After reading this thread at the office in the last half-hour of the workday (and giving myself an aching hard-on under the desk that was just begging to be taken out of the fly and caressed), I couldn't stop thinking about this kind of "self hosing" fun on the commute home to Alexandria last night. Pissplay is a secondary turn-on for me -- not like, say, frotting cock-to-cock and chest-to-chest with a hairy guy, which I'm always, always in the mood for -- but something that I get the urge to experiment with once in a while.

So anyway, I definitely had that urge last night, and had plenty of time to reflect on it, because I just missed the 7 o'clock commuter bus from the metro station and decided to hoof it homeward rather than hang around waiting for the bus. It's about a 45-minute walk, which didn't bother me, but I hadn't taken into account the swampish humidity of summer afternoons in DC, and my shirt and hair were soaked in sweat by the time I reached my apartment.

At this point I badly wanted a shower, and I had a fairly urgent need to take a piss -- but thinking back to the watersports thread on CPM, I decided to cool down and chug a beer before heading into the bathroom. There was some java left in the coffeemaker from that morning, so I poured it over ice with some milk and sugar and tanked up on that as I sorted the mail and stripped out of my sweaty clothes. All the while my bladder is starting to throb in time with my semi-hardon.

Finally I felt I was ready. Lay down naked in the bathtub, head propped up against the foot of the tub so I'd have a good view. Stroking my meaty dick, now 75% erect, and aiming it upwards as I relaxed. Nothing for a few seconds, then a quick inch-high golden spurt, then -- whoooaaaa, a long warm yellow stream of piss arcing out of my cock in a liquid parabola before splashing down hot and wet on my chest hair.

I let the stream go like that for a few seconds, enjoying the pseudo-ejaculatory sensation of the flow through my throbbing shaft. Then, with my hand, I aimed my dick upward so that the stream went straight up vertically and straight back down to soak my penis, balls, and pubic hair. Hosed down my legs quickly before "clamping down" to stop the piss flow. My bladder pushed back, trying to resume the stream as I rubbed the warm puddle of piss on my chest all over my torso.

Opening my mouth, I relaxed and watched in fascination as the arc squirted onto my chest again; then adjusted the angle of my "water cannon" again and gulped down the warm, salty urine as fast as I could piss it into my mouth. I was now rigidly erect with excitement but still able to force some piss out as I masturbated my wet dick.

I kept playing like that for a while, pissing and stopping and pissing some more, until finally my bladder was empty and my dong was ready for a good edging with poppers and bear porn. I blotted myself off with a hand towel and went out into the living room to continue my bate...

Just to give your dick a break...

...why not pry your hands away from your joystick for a few minutes and make some art with this neato Web toy:

You can save your creations and send the link to friends, as I did a little while ago.

Once you're done, you can get back to doing what you came here for, you insatiable dong fiends.

UPDATE: A reader's Picassohead submission. Nicely done, gooner.

A masturbator looks back

On the Yahoo group Chronic Penis Masturbators, a member shares an experience from his dormitory days:

...From then on, I was addicted to the feeling of my hand masturbating my penis.

My brother went to the Air Force academy, so I finally had the room to myself. I'd choose to start about 10 PM, when my parents thought I was asleep. We had some mirror tiles around the house from a renovation project, so one time I put one behind my head, held one in my left hand, flipped my legs over my head, and discovered self-sucking. Just seeing my own cum drip into my open mouth was such a turn-on. I used to tape record the sound of my own jerkoff sessions. [Me too! I discovered early on that the shicka-shicka sound that my hand made as it slid up and down spit-lubed erection was incredibly arousing. -- Ed.]

When I got to college [...] I got this hot looking redheaded preppy boy for a roommate. He had some school duties to perform every morning, and an early class schedule, so in the morning, we’d both go to shower, and after he dressed and left, lock the door, and lie back on the bed, with my knees over the edge. I'd open up my robe, pull my arms out of the sleeves, lay back on my robe, find the tube of Vaseline Intensive Care I'd stashed away, and start to work.

I often closed my eyes so I could picture my favorite fantasy scenes: Rough older guys fucking me in the ass and mouth, jacking me off. A hot university professor I had for English, alone in his office, with me coming in to ask about my grades. Our dorm communal showers.

Read the rest on the CPM message board.

Fun with a buddy

Saturday morning. Snuggling my face deep into the flannel pillowcase as I grind my piss hard-on against the mattress. I'm in that dreamy, in-and-out phase of sleep -- what's technically called the hypnopompic state, when you're emerging from sleep to being fully awake. In simpler language, it's Snooze Alarm Sleep, when you fall back into fragments of dreams in the ten-minute intervals between the alarm clock's buzzing.

Anyway. There I am, drifting in and out of consciousness, but aware of my erection the whole time, when the phone rings.

It's Doug, my newest masturbation buddy.

''Just wondering if you're in the mood for some company,'' he announces, in his Virginia twang.

I'm standing in my living room, phone to my ear, naked as a caveman, and my penis begins to rise and stiffen at the thought of playing around with Doug.

''Yeah,'' I say, reaching down to squeeze my dick as I'm talking to him. The place is a mess, though, so I tell him to come over around 1 pm -- I need time to fix breakfast, shower, clean up my apartment a bit before company arrives.

_{[Shimmer, shimmer, BLING! In real life, a couple hours pass as Rob does the dishes, vacuums the carpet, lights some incense to combat the persistent odor of rat pee, and takes a shower so he'll be all fresh and clean when Doug gets here. It's necessary, but not sexy; this is why sitcoms have those musical transitions between scenes, to convey a sense of elapsed time]}

The doorbell rings. Doug's here.

Let me tell you a little about Doug. He's a married guy in his early 50s; working man's build with a hairy barrel chest, huge shoulders and, as he puts it, "big Popeye hands." His face reminds me a little bit of Dennis Franz from NYPD Blue, if you want an image. Doug has shyly hinted about some M2M experiences when he was college-age, but has only recently begun to explore that again after decades of marriage, and I'm his first regular buddy. So needless to say, he's fucking full of energy.

As soon as the door closes behind him, Doug has stepped forward to wrap his arms around me, pull my crotch against his, and kiss me. I'm really glad he doesn't have reservations about getting cuddly -- some bi guys think it's too gay to snuggle and kiss with another man, while some gay guys think it's too intimate to do that stuff with a j/o buddy. Me, I've enjoyed "recreational" cuddles and tongue wrestling outside of romantic contexts, just as I've enjoyed recreational sex. I think that stubble or facial hair looks so masculine that I can't help but want to explore it with my lips, the same way I love brushing my face against a bud's chest hair or inhaling the tangy sweat of his armpit as we roll around on the bed: My dick wants to be constantly reminded that I'm with a MAN.

"Hey," says Doug, grinding his stiffness against mine as we stand fully dressed in my living room, "how's it going?"

"Doing great, man," I answer, finally breaking away from our through-the-pants swordfight long enough to offer him a beer. [to be continued...]